Rainbow
by Soulreciever
Summary: Given the chance to stop the tragedy upon the Rainbow Bridge would Suabru act or would he allow destiny to take its course? Vauge crossover. Slash. AU
1. Hitsuzen

Rainbow.

1. Hitsuzen

T: This fic is inspired by the same plot bunny as 'I wish' but has been twiddled enough that it should read like a completely separate story. This is currently a work in progress and as I've only given myself a two chapter buffer area the update speed may slow down further down the line. There is a more comprehensive XXXholic crossover here so some vague knowledge of that series would be useful. Angst, Slash and spoilers for the entirety of X and for the more recent developments of XXXholic.

I own nothing here apart from the plot…please pity me for that fact!

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He little trusted any of the locations that Yuuko sent him to, fearful always of wayward spirits harassing him and perhaps even injuring him.

He trusted this particular assignment even less, if only because of the slight hint of concern that had been in his employer's voice.

"Why couldn't I have bought cherry blossom tea from the shop down the road?" He enquires, the question more for himself than for his 'companion'. Nether the less he receives a quiet, "Hn," from Doumeki as a signal both that the stoic archer had heard him and that he had no want to discuss such matters.

Undeterred Watanuki continued with his rant, complaining about Yuuko's craving for odd things, her annoying habit of sending Doumeki even though he did not truly need the archer with him and the oblique pieces of advice she always gave him on trips like this.

Indeed so busy was he in ranting that he failed to pay attention to where his feet were taking him and, before he knew it, he was walking through Ueno Park.

"Didn't you say that Yuuko told you to stay away from short cuts today?"

"What do you know? And what's with the sudden attempt at conversation? I was beginning to believe that you'd forgotten to say anything other than 'hn'…" He trails, mid flow, as a sudden creeping sensation washes over him.

"There is something here."

His feet lead him down through the cherry groves until he is stood beneath the tallest, and most probably the widest, cherry tree he has ever seen.

The aura from this tree is a dark, oppressive, thing that speaks to him of death and the power that such a thing holds.

"We need to destroy this tree." Almost the instant the words are out of his mouth Doumeki is at his side, his fingers reaching around to grab at his bow.

Then there is a firm pressure about his ankles and everything has turned upside down.

"I would not advise doing that, if I were you." The voice is an empty thing, which sounded more as an automated voice than that of a human being.

If he struggled he could just see a strip of black cloth out of the corner of his eye and, curious despite the situation, he enquires,

"Who are you and what is this tree?"

"To know is to die, child."

There is a sharp crack a little below him and for a brief instant he can see Doumeki's face before the branches have again closed about it.

"It seems that that boy wishes to keep you safe." The voice remarks, the vaguest hint of an emotion contained now within it.

The world is turned, then, back to its proper alignment and, at last, he can see the owner of the voice clearly.

He is dressed, from head to toe, in black a fact that makes the white of his skin seem almost sickly in its pallor and that emphasises the two separate hues of his eyes.

The right is a warm hazel and the instant he sees it he knows it for the eye of a hunter. The left is a vivid green and, unlike its counterpart, it is void of all intensity…is as an eye that one might see upon a corpse.

"What are you, child and why did you come here?"

He thinks to lie, but knows, somehow, that should he do that the situation would get infinitely worse, both for himself and for Doumeki.

"I am simply an errand boy on the way to fetch some cherry blossom tea for my employer." The other is at his side then, the odd, mismatched eyes, assessing him with controlled patients.

"That is, on the surface, true and yet there is more to your tale.

"For a simple errand boy would not be able to see both this tree and myself, nor would he bare an eye such as that in the right side of your face."

This close to the other he could smell the clawing scent of decay upon his skin, a scent that came not only from old blood, but from the lingering traces of spirits.

Though he begins to be truly frightened by this other he can not, yet, give away the true nature of his job and thus he opens his mouth to again voice a surface truth.

The words are stopped by the appearance of one of Yuuko's odd butterflies; the creature flittering a moment about his face before it came to land on the others shoulder.

"So this is 'hitsuzen', is it?" He enquires after a moment. Watanuki obviously looks as confused as he feels for the stranger informs him, "It seems you were sent deliberately to meet me." Before he makes a sweeping gesture with his hand that causes the tree to lease both Doumeki and himself.

…………………………………………………………………………..

Yuuko is waiting for him at the front door, her slim form wrapped into a kimono covered in bright pink cherry blossoms.

The stranger bows politely to his employer and says,

"If you had wanted to talk to me, Yuuko-san, you could simply have come to see me."

"I believe that you would simply have dismissed me, Subaru."

"So you chose to endanger the boy?"

"Watanuki can look after himself."

"If that were true he would have still his true right eye."

Yuuko tenses, just barely and, a false smile coming to her lips, she remarks,

"Our guest would appreciate some of those sweet pastries you made last week." So desperate is he to get away from the oppressiveness of their 'guest's' aura that he complies to the command without complaint.

Yuuko is talking quietly to their guest when he brings the pastries and, not wishing to disturb her more than is necessary, he sets the tray down at the threshold of the doorway.

He makes it but an inch down the corridor before her voice is calling him back, her normal teasing tone present again in the request.

"Watanuki, I wonder if I might have a moment to introduce you to our guest." He wishes to refuse and yet there is something in her manner that suggests such a thing would result in a further addition to the dept he owed her.

"Of course, Yuuko-san."

"Subaru, this is my young ward Watanuki Kimihiro. Watanuki this is Sumeragi Subaru, thirteenth head of the auspicious Sumeragi clan."

"Then this is the Onmyoji you mentioned once before?"

"That is correct."

"Why did you not mention that he was a practitioner of the dark arts?"

Yuuko looks to Subaru and the Onmyoji smiled a small, empty, smile before replying,

"I was not always a practitioner of the 'dark' arts Watanuki-san and perhaps that is why Yuuko-san failed to mention it."

"Thank you for your time, Watanuki. I will call you when we are done."

Thus dismissed Watanuki settles into cleaning the treasure room and eventually he becomes so bogged down in polishing and dusting that he forgets about their mysterious visitor.

Yuuko does eventually call him and after requesting a glass of chilled kirsch she informs him,

"Do not go near Ueno again."

"What is that tree?"

"A dark necessity that you are better off forgetting."

"What of Sumeragi-san?"

A distanced look comes to her eyes and, after a moment of silence, she replies,

"That is up to him."

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T: Chapter one out of the way! I wanted to have Watanuki actually meet Subaru this time and after a little while debating this set up came about. The bit about Watanuki's feet leading him on the short cut without coherent thought can be viewed either as ingrained habit or Hitsuzen.

Shamefully Doumeki has come out as the stoic individual that fan cannon has crafted him into rather than the well balanced character in the manga…in my defence he's most likely doing it to deliberately cheese Watanuki off!

Finally Subaru will have noticed Watanuki's half eye because he is both Sakurazukamori and well versed in the whole eye issue! Next chapter Sunday at the latest but until then R+R…it makes me feel wanted!


	2. Temptation

2. Temptation.

T: Having realised that the first chapter doesn't really give you too much of an idea of what's happening I thought I'd be nice and give you the second chapter today rather than on Sunday. Warnings remain, for the moment, the same and it's still not mine.

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Yuuko had taken the change in his manner in her stride and, after talking to him a little of his new life and introducing him properly to the boy he had trapped in the sakura, she had told him,

"There is a way to change all of this, Subaru."

"Perhaps and yet it comes at a price, does it not?"

"Everything has a price, Subaru and yet sometimes the reward outweighs that cost."

"What would my 'reward' be, Yuuko-san?"

"It would be your choice." She had remarked as he had passed him a small vile of pink hued liquid. "This liquid allows the one who drinks it the chance to fulfil their deepest wish."

"And what would the price be for such a chance?"

"It would depend on the wish."

His fingers had tightened, a moment, about the vile and then he was pushing it back towards Yuuko.

"I have no want to participate in such things anymore, Yuuko-san."

"I do not think you should dismiss this so readily, Subaru." She remarks as she had again handed him the vile.

He had found that he could not again lease the vile and though he had talked to Yuuko of destroying the thing he had know, even then, that such a course of action had been lost to him.

After returning home he sat for an hour simply looking at the object, contemplating the many things he could do with its power and then he had left to feed the tree.

The job was as countless others and, but an hour after he had left, he was again returning to the dark sanctuary of his apartment.

The vile remained where he had left it, the pail rose of the liquid inside all but sparkling in the moonlight.

Somehow the thing comes again into his hands, the weight of it as the one fixed certainty in this whole affair.

Yuuko had said that the liquid allowed its drinker a chance to 'fulfil their deepest wish' and yet what was there left for him to wish for?

Kamui had won the final battle and the world had moved on…had become a 'better' place.

All those he had loved, or truest, were either dead or someone other than they had been.

And finally the one thing that he had wished for had been stolen from him and twisted in such a way that it had become as his greatest nightmare.

If he drunk this liquid would he have chance again to fulfil that want? Might he be able to stop that hurt before it even occurred?

Before he can stop himself he has un-corked the liquid and the sweet, intoxicating, scent of the thing is so enticing that he can do nothing but consume it.

For a brief instant there seems to be no effect, then a sharp pain flairs across his forehead and the world passes, momentarily, into darkness.

He awakes beneath the shelter of the tree, this change in location the first sign he has that something has, indeed, been changed by the liquid. However, it is only when he feels the tree reaching out to him in curiosity that he has the first inclination of what this change might be.

Having no want to jump to conclusions he searches out and purchases a newspaper.

In small print near the top corner of the paper is the date 'March 18th 1999'

He has managed, somehow, to travel back in time.

………………………………………………………………………………

He spends the last yen in his pocket on a cup of coffee and sits in the relative quiet of Ueno considering what his next step was to be.

Clearly he would have to find some form of employment, something that would give him yen enough to live on and that would keep him as much out of the way of his other self as possible.

He opens the paper he had purchased in order to prove, or disprove his hunch and, after reading a few of the news articles, he settles onto the employment pages.

After an hour he remains still in the same predicament and he is just considering the possibility of informing his grandmother of his situation when an add, at last, catches his eye.

Edged in butterflies the add was worded in such a way that it quickly became apparent that it was written specifically with his own self in mind. Indeed so precise were the requirements that, upon calling the number, he was little surprised to hear Yuuko's voice answering on the other end of the line.

"How did you know that I would go back, Yuuko?"

"It was Hitsuzen."

"You believe that you might be able to help me?"

"No. I _can_ help you, Subaru, yet that aid will be added into the final cost of this wish."

"Tell me."

"There is an apartment in the Shinjuku high rises that have set aside for you.

"It is held under the name of Yuji Kimoru and as far as your neighbours are aware you are an aspiring novelist.

"Inside the apartment I have left you an identity card and the means to access you clan's bank account without drawing attention to yourself.

"To that regard, I think you need to work on scaling down your aura, you are, after all, a little 'conspicuous' at the moment."

"I shall do what I can, Yuuko."

His new apartment is situated only a floor above that which he had occupied throughout 'The Year of The Bet' and thus he feels at home almost the very instant that he opens the door.

He works, a while, on calming down his aura and then he sets out again for Ueno.

The tree listens to his explanation with an intrigued fascination and agrees to keep his connection to it quiet as long as Subaru supplies it, every now and again, with an additional meal.

He is just heading back towards his apartment when a familiar voice enquires,

"Might you have a light I could borrow for a moment?"

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T: Do I need to spell out who the owner of the voice is? No? Good! A few things before I toddle off…

Yuuko's become a little OOC I'm afraid, but I needed her to play a very specific role in this fic and to do that she needed to change a little from how she is portrayed in XXXholic. Hopefully fans of the series will forgive me this liberty!

Yuji Kimoru is the alias Subaru uses in 'I wish' and is used again here because I like it and because it didn't really get much of an airing in that fic!

As to Subaru's new profession…it was either writing or modelling and as Tanuki-dono has done such a good job of Subaru as a model in 'Illusionary Tandem' I decided to go with writing.

Basically this profession will allow him monetary stability with the least amount of commitment as far as time is concerned. Also it will give him the excuse to do a little snooping should he have wish!

Oh and Tree-san is not being nice, it's merely getting the most out of an odd situation.

Next chapter on Sunday but until then R+R…you know you want to!


	3. Selfish Love

3. Selfish Love. 

T: Am hoping the lack of reviews, so far, is due to the slow start rather than a dislike of the story…even if its not I'm going to continue going with this one as I like it even if no one else does!

Anyway to the story itself…warnings remain the same with the slightest extra sprinkling of Angst…blame Subaru not me! I own nothing here apart from the plot.

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He is heading back towards his apartment when a familiar voice enquires,

"Might you have a light I could borrow for a moment?"

He manages to stifle his initial impulse to whisper the others name and instead he replies,

"Of course."

The light of the lighter flame flickers again between then and he feels a sudden creeping sense of Deja-vu

"Thank you." The other remarks and then, a familiar smile crossing onto his lips he enquires, "What brings you out this way at such an hour?"

He considers all the possible replies to this question and then brushing a hand through his hair he replies,

"I fear that my muse would not let me sleep."

"Your muse?"

"I am an aspiring author and unfortunately inspiration chooses to strike me at the strangest of hours."

"Are you published yet?"

"Not yet, no, but I am hopeful that I will be one day."

"I am sure that something will come up."

"Thank you." He hands back the lighter and Subaru believes this will be it when the other enquires,

"Do you live somewhere nearby, or does your muse also like travelling?"

"I am in the Shinjuku high rises."

"Then would you care for a little company?"

"Yes, thank you…"

"Ah yes, of course, where are my manners? I am Sakurazuka Seishiro."

"Yuji Kimoru."

Seishiro continues to talk amiably to him as they walk and he finds that having a discussion with the other without subtext or mask, is a liberating thing and though he remains cautious always of showing the other who he truly is, he finds himself relaxing in his presence.

Eventually they reach the base of the high rises and, though he has no want to be again from the others side, he bids his farewell.

"A moment, Yuji-san."

He stops and suddenly Seishiro is all but an inch from him, his fingers brushing away the hair that has fallen before his eyes,

"You have the most fascinating eyes, Yuji-san, eyes like no others I have ever seen and yet, somehow…

"Somehow I can not shake the feeling that we have met before."

There is a distant want in his heart to expose his identity, a want that is being suppressed, for the moment, by the cold logic of the Sakurazukamori.

"It is simply a case of mistaken identity, Sakurazuka-san, for I am most certain that I have never met you before this day."

"Have you any plans for the morning?" Seishiro enquires after a moment.

"My agent wishes a word with me." He replies, the lie spilling from his tongue without thought or consideration.

"A word that will take about an hour?"

"Most likely."

"Then we can meet afterwards for a late breakfast."

"Where will I find you?"

"By the Sunshine 60."

He resists the odd temptation to reach for his right eye and instead smiles a slightly empty smile and replies,

"I will see you tomorrow then."

He is breathing heavily by the time he reaches his apartment and, despite his greatest attempt; he can not wipe the smile from his lips.

There is an envelope waiting for him on the threshold of the apartment and he has but to see the butterflies in the top corner to know whom it is from.

'Subaru.

I have taken the liberty of supplying you with two manuscripts for the novels Yuji-san has been writing and with an agent. As with the last favour this shall be added to the final cost, yet, unlike previously this is the last aid that I shall give you.

'For the payment you shall give can not stretch to afford anymore aid and you have now all that you should need to fulfil your wish.

'Please be cautious of making large changes in destiny, for you might find that in making such changes you have, unknowingly, changed the conclusion of the war.

Yuuko.'

The manuscripts wait, patiently, for him on the bed and though he had left the apartment locked he does not question their presence.

Both are thicker than he had believed they might be and bear, what to him seem to be, oblique titles.

Aware that he will have need to know these novels inside and out he opens the first and begins to read.

…………………………………………………………………………………

The ringing of the phone wakes him the next morning and, after a moment of disorientation, he rises out of bed and lifts the thing to his ear.

"Kimoru desu."

"Is this Yuji?" A soft, female voice enquires.

"Yes?"

"This is Mihara Yuri from Tenshi, Kimoru-san and I must say that I am glad that you've finally decided to completely break your hermitage. "

"It seemed the only way for me to make a true impact on the world."

"Something that I've been telling you for a while…but I didn't call just to tell you off for being overly shy, I also called to make sure that you are still okay for today."

"Today?"

"You agreed, in your last letter, to meet me on the 19th of March and that is today, is it not?"

"Indeed it is."

"Then I shall see you in 'Sakura' at nine just as we agreed."

"I promise."

It seemed too much of a coincidence that he had had a meeting with 'his' agent the very day he had claimed to and he could not help but wonder if Yuuko, or perhaps her beloved hitsuzen, had had a hand in this.

Sakura is an upmarket coffee house that was but a short walk from his apartment and that had a quiet tranquillity about it which was appealing.

He had been sat down but two minutes when a petit woman enquired,

"Are you Kimoru-san?"

"I am and you would be Mihara-san?"

"That is correct." She took the seat across from him and after taking a moment to order coffee for herself she remarked, "You really described yourself perfectly, Kimoru-san, right down to your eyes."

"An accuracy I hope carries over into my books, Mihara-san."

"Indeed it does, Kimoru-san." She takes a sip of her coffee and then informs him, "I have some good news, Kimoru-san."

"Really?"

"As I told you in my letter last month Arsie were tempted by 'The Cage', indeed so tempted that I sent 'Vampire Heart.'

"I received their response yesterday and I am overjoyed to be the first to offer my congratulations."

"I couldn't have done it without you, Mihara-san."

They remain talking for a great while, Mihara-san learning all that she could of her mysterious client and Subaru stretching and adapting the persona of Yuji until he was almost as that individual.

Eventually Mihara excuses herself and, after finishing his own coffee, he heads off towards the Sunshine 60.

……………………………………………………………………………..

Seishiro is waiting for him a little before the building, dressed, as always, in an immaculate black suit, the typical outfit noticeably devoid of one particular accessory.

He can not but wonder why Seishiro has chosen to expose his eyes not only to his scrutiny, but also to the scrutiny of all that surround him.

A curiosity that fades when Seishiro enquires,

"How was your 'talk' Kimoru-san?"

"I am to be a published author."

"Congratulations."

There is a moment of silence and then Seishiro enquires,

"Where would you like to go, Kimoru-san?"

He takes a moment to answer, his mind coming up with ideas and then striking them off either for the lack of suitability or because they have been destroyed.

Eventually only one location has the informality and the stability he desires and thus he decides upon it.

"I have yet to visit the zoo in Ueno, perhaps we could go there?"

"It sounds like a good suggestion."

The way Seishiro is around him seems all but parental when compared with the intensity that the other had fixated upon him in the past.

Sometimes he can see the hidden threat of Seishiro's power in his remaining eye and yet it is a distant thing hidden well beneath the mask of geniality and good natured kindness that Subaru recalls well.

"Will you let me read one?" Seishiro enquires eventually.

"I do not know if I should…my books are like little pieces of my soul and for you to read them…"

"A few million strangers will be doing that in a few months time."

"Yes, but they are not you."

Seishiro catches a-hold of his chin and suddenly his lips are pressing insistently against his own.

He knows he should consider the version of himself present in this time…knows he should stop this before it starts and yet…

He ahs been so long without warmth…so ling without companionship that he has no want but to be, for the moment, selfish.

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T: Hopefully that kiss will win you over! As usual a few notes and then I'll let you be!

I am aware that Subaru is being a little OOC in this first meeting, it is very deliberate. You see he is being Yuji here rather than Subaru and thus the OOC fades away!

I am assuming that as the twins went to Ueno for picnics in TB the park is but a little from Shinjuku…accept my apologies if I'm wrong on that regard.

Seishiro is also deliberately OOC here; this because some part of him knows that Yuji is, in fact, Subaru and is reacting accordingly. While on this subject Seishiro does not recognise Subaru because 1) the Sakurazukamori mark is no longer on the boy and 2) The Sakura is playing around with Subaru's appearance.

The true writer of 'Yuji's' novels will remain, I fear, a mystery. As to his being a hermit…what better excuse for his agent not seeing him for an entire year? For those curious Yuuko has been the one sending Yuji's agent his letters and was also the one to employ her in the first place. These are both things that have been taken into account and added to the price of Subaru's wish...and no; I don't know what it is yet!

R+R…I need to know that someone likes this fic!


	4. Compulsion

4. Compulsion.

T: Having had my first review for this fic I feel happier about my choice to continue posting and more confident about how this fic is progressing…so thank you Umbra for the confidence boost!

Slight skipping ahead of the timeline in this part…hopefully it won't be too disconcerting! Warnings remain the same and I still own nothing apart from plot!

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It has been a month since the kiss and though he has spoken every night to Seishiro he can not quite find the courage to see the other again.

He had had the excuse of being busy preparing for the launch of his novels, yet now that this preparation is at an end that particular reason for his unavailability has been lost.

Thus when Seishiro rings later that afternoon he is left with little choice but to accept the other's invitation to his apartment.

He is given directions to a stylish apartment complex that is located but a little from where Subaru had lived during this time.

Indeed he can almost see his apartment from Seishiro's window and the underlying connotations of this unnerve him slightly.

The older man tells him a little of his history, the lies within this story so intricate that, had he not known the truth, Subaru would have been completely taken in.

The topic turns, eventually, to his novels and Seishiro thanks him for the loan of his manuscripts before enquiring,

"Have you suffered some form of heart break Yuji-kun?"

"What makes you ask that?"

"Some of the things Kiro says to Chiro in 'The Cage' were full of such pain that it had to come from experience."

He too had felt that 'The Cage' had been written by one suffering from a broken heart and he wonders, not for the first time, who had actually written the books.

There was, after all, a great deal of his own hurt contained in the words and the odd notion had come to him that perhaps the books had been crafter by an alternative version of himself.

Yet whether this was the truth or no mattered little at the moment and allowing a little of his hurt free from his mask he replied,

"Yes, I have felt that pain…"

"As have I."

"Really?"

" Really." His eyes drift to the window and, his voice distant, he says, "We met when we were both still very young and we began a friendship that developed, eventually, into something deeper.

"He was everything to me…I even lost my eye while protecting him…then his sister died and suddenly he changed.

"For a while I believed it would be fine, but then he vanished without a trace."

He knows that Seishiro is talking of himself…knows that he is using his pain and suffering to coin some sympathy and for the first time since he had found the man again, he despises him.

He has a part still to play, however and pushing his anger away he enquires,

"Why are you telling me this?"

"You allowed me to see your hurt, Yuji-kun and so I believed it only fair that I allowed you to see mine."

"Air all our scars before he begin, you mean?"

"Indeed."

His lips are again upon his own then, their gentle warmth a welcomed comfort that will quickly become a sought after familiarity should he allow it.

Yet, for the moment at least, he has no want for such attention and when Seishiro breaks for aid he moves a little from the other.

"'Though you believe your kiss a venomous thing it has shattered the loneliness in my heart.'"

"You think to use my own words against me, Sakurazuka-san?"

"No, I think to use them to help you, Yuji-kun and I have asked you before to call me Seishiro."

A part of him wishes to accept the request for intimacy and yet he has lost, for the moment, the want to give into this weakness.

"I'd best be going." Seishiro catches his wrist, the pressure of his fingers enough that his skin is whitening slightly.

"You are hurting me, Sakurazuka-san."

There is an instant of almost genuine shock upon his face and then he is leasing his grip,

"Will you meet me tomorrow?"

He is aware that tomorrow is the day that the Sunshine 60 will crumble and that, even if he had want to make plans, Seishiro would be otherwise occupied.

"I think, perhaps, that we should not see one another for a while, Sakurazuka-san.

"It is clear to me that you have not yet completely let go he that you loved and I have no want to be second best again."

"Then I will allow both of us a little time, Yuji-kun."

"Thank you."

……………………………………………………………………………

There is something…unusual…about Yuji Kimoru and it had been this unique edge that had first pulled him to the other.

He had watched him a great while before making his presence known and the way that the other had interacted with the sakura had seemed all too familiar.

Curious as to why a complete stranger has inspired such a feeling he had made himself known to the other and, upon meeting those odd eyes, he had become ensnared.

He had believed this level of intoxication possible only for one person and yet his affection for Yuji did not diminish.

Indeed as he had read the books that were as a looking glass upon the boy's psyche a desperate urge to protect the author had swamped him.

This strength of emotion had finally become enough to fracture his control and he had come all too close to allowing the other to see his true self.

Perhaps, therefore, the distance Yuji had requested would prove to be a useful thing for himself also. For it would allow him to consider the situation and perhaps comprehend why it was that a relative stranger had managed to get so close.

He has just settled down in his favourite restaurant when he feels his connection to Subaru flair and curious he heads for the Onmyoji's location.

The Kekkai is crumbling already when he comes in sight of the Sunshine 60, the reason for its decomposition clear as his eyes find Subaru's form.

His right eye is closed and, judging by the blood that coats the lid, it shall not be opening again.

The Dark Kamui stands a little from the younger Onmyoji, the blood upon his fingers as a clear indication that he is the once who has harmed Subaru so.

He will not allow this indiscretion to go unpunished, yet, for the moment, he can do nothing without risking the 'Kamui's' wrath.

Thus he lingers only until Subaru has been taken from the area and then he leaves in pursuit of the boy.

Kamui remains with Subaru until the next morning and then he is taken away from the other's side by a young man Seishiro does not recognise. His one obstacle thus removed he takes a moment to compose himself before he crosses into Subaru's hospital room.

He is lying upon his back, his arms folded across his chest and his un-bandaged eye, for the moment, closed.

"I did not expect you to come here."

"I was worried for your health…a concern that was justified judging by the look of you.

"Have you not been eating again Subaru-kun?"

He is graced, momentarily, with the startling green of Subaru's remaining eye and then it is lost again behind the boy's eyelid.

"Why should you care, Seishiro? I am, after all, little more to you than an attractive ornament."

He comes to the boy's side then, his hands lifting to brush at the gauze a moment before he replies,

"No one likes to see beauty so recklessly marred, Subaru-kun."

The boy flinches from his touch, his hands lifting to catch his wrists; both these movements slurred by the effects of the drugs in the boy's system.

"Why can you not simply let me be?"

Smiling he breaks the boy's hold and brushing the skin upon his hand he replies,

"We are linked until death, Subaru-kun."

The pentagram upon Subaru's skin flairs momentarily at the words and the younger man looks at the thing with unbridled disgust before he enquires,

"If it is as simply as that then why not just kill me, Seishiro?"

He little likes the connotation of the question, nor the barely concealed hope in Subaru's voice, yet still he replies,

"The time has not yet come for me to sever out connection, Subaru-kun."

"Yet why, Seishiro? For what purpose do you spare me?"

Recalling something he had read in 'The Cage' he replies,

"'You are being held in this cage not by my hand but by your own, for it was your own naivety that ensnared you and your miscomprehension that holds you still.'"

He leases his grip on the Onmyoji then and stepping from him he informs him,

"I am not what you believe me to be." Before he leaves the room at last.

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T: As you can most likely tell things are going to get…interesting…from this point on.

'The Cage' and 'Vampire Heart' are not only the titles for Yuji's novels but of two songs by the wonderful HIM…those that caught that reference may also have seen that the first quote Sei-chan gives is, in fact, a slight variation on lyrics from 'Killing loneliness' a song that is all but written for my beloved Sakurazukamori

Next chapter Sunday at the latest until then R+R, the more love you give me the move I'll return!


	5. Haemorrhage

5. Haemorrhage. 

T: Not too much to say about this chapter, however I wanted to tell Ruth that the triangle is one of the things that I particularly like about this story and to keep watching as things are going to get more complex! Am upping the angst again (just to be safe I promise) and adding a 'made up medical practices' warning. Everything in _italics_ is in the perspective of 1999 Subaru…hopefully this should reduce the chances for confusion! Nothing you see here is my own apart from the plot.

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He is reading quietly in his apartment when a sudden, sharp, pain flairs in his head and a borage of images assail him…

…Seishiro's fingers brushing at the gauze of his blind eye…

…the discomfort in his eye as Subaru asks, outright, to be killed…

…the frustration of Seishiro's refusal to act and the confusion at the other's parting statement.

In his own past Seishiro had not visited him after the disaster on Sunshine 60, something that had furthered his belief that the other had truly considered him nothing more than glass and that had made the revelation on the Rainbow Bridge all the more painful.

Yet it seemed that now this was not the case, that, for some reason, the Sakurazukamori had chosen to bare a little of his true heart.

'You are the reason behind this change.' A voice informed him, 'The abnormality of your presence in this time creating small disturbances that are turning, slowly, into giant ripples.'

He is swept, then, into the darkness of a dreamscape, the pail form of his 'captor' appearing at his side a moment later.

"Why have you brought me here, Kakyo?"

'I wished a moment of your time, Sakurazuka-san.'

"To warn me of the dangers of interfering? Yuuko-san has already done that."

'Perhaps, but you have not truly listened to her,'

The darkness of the dreamscape fills with pail pink Sakura and, a moment later, his sister appears before them.

'This tragedy affected us both, Sakurazuka-san, yourself because one you cared for was killed by he that you loved and myself because Hokuto was my world.' He pauses a moment to watch the events play to their conclusion and then he says 'I knew, a little before, that this was going to occur and I thought to change things…thought to stop her…

'Yet the day before I had planned to warn her I dreamt of how the world would be had she lived.

'Dreamt of my freedom and your continued incarceration in your heart…dreamt of your envelopment into the void left by my absence and of the terrible fate that awaited you.

'A fate that she could not stop and that lead, eventually, to your death.' He gestured with his hand and before them blooms another image of his sister.

Older, now, than the sixteen years that she had lived in his lifetime, the toll of those extra years showing clearly upon her face.

For her smile has dimmed and the strength of the misery in her eyes makes her as a perfect mirror of the man he had become during 1999.

'After you were gone she began to change…she began to care less about her appearance, began to smile less and then, suddenly, she too shut the world away…

'Though it was selfish of me I chose to let her die…chose to allow her to remain as a bright spark in my mind than wither into nothingness.' The image fades and again the darkness surrounds them.

'Should you continue on this path then more will be altered than you have wish to be. Indeed it is more than possible that your want to stop the tragedy upon the Rainbow Bridge will cost the greatest of prices; that of mankind's very existence.'

"You forget, Kakyo, that I have no care for mankind's fate…that I am intrinsically selfish."

'I do not forget, Sakurazuka-san, but I had hoped, perhaps, that your view had changed.'

"It has not."

'Then head me well, Sakurazuka-san, your presence here is as a stone in a river: The stone disrupts the natural flow of the stream just as you are disrupting the flow of time. However, the stream also begins to wear at the stone, dissolving it piece by piece until it has faded completely.

'As the stream wears the stone, time is wearing your mind, Sakurazuka-san. Yet, unlike the stream; time's wear is a swift thing and if you continue to intervene you will pay with your life.'

"If by dying I assure his life, Kakyo, then I will die willingly."

…………………………………………………………………………………

He wakes to find blood streaming from his nose and recalling the Dreamseer's words he goes, immediately, to the Shinjuku hospital.

After an hour of scans and tests the doctor informs him that his brain has suffered a very minor haemorrhage.

The doctor asks him to return for another scan in the week and instructs him to do as little as he can for the next 24 hours.

Thus discharged he heads for the lift and is greeted with the familiar diminutive form of Kamui.

The boy looks somewhat haggard and, compelled by the minute want in his heart to protect the lad, he enquires,

"Is everything all right?"

The boy's violet eyes regard him with a momentary suspicion and then he replies,

"Yes, thank you."

"Forgive my forwardness; it was just that you looked a little pale."

"I have not been sleeping well of late."

"I find that a glass of warm milk helps chase the daemons away."

A black amusement crosses the boy's eyes and bowing he remarks,

"I am indebted to you for that piece of wisdom…"

"Kimoru Yuji."

A recognition sparks in the boy's eyes and, a little of the suspicion fading from his eyes he enquires,

"Are you, by any chance, the author Kimoru Yuji?"

"I am, indeed."

"I recently gave a copy of 'The Cage' to he that I am here to visit and…"

Whatever it is that the boy says next is lost to Subaru's ears as he is assailed by another ball of fractured images…

…Kamui pressing a copy of 'The Cage' into his fingers…

…the anger in his heart as his eye finds an all too familiar quote…

…the sudden, irrational, jealousy that swamps him as he contemplates why Seishiro knew those words before they had been published.

The hidden strength of Kamui's fingers grasp, suddenly, about his arm and his world comes forcefully back to the 'present'.

"Kimoru-san, is everything alright?"

"I just need a moment."

"Perhaps I should call a doctor."

"It is not necessary, thank you."

Kamui releases his grip then and, after an instant of silence, he enquires,

"Would you care to accompany me as far as my friend's room?"

"So that you might keep an eye on me?"

"Yes, but you shall also be able to keep an eye on me."

"Then I accept gladly…"

"Shirou Kamui."

……………………………………………………………………………

_He feels Kamui's approach a little before the boy reaches him, the extra few moments used to wake himself as much as he can and to move Yuzihara's gift to a less conspicuous place on the bed._

_It is thanks, also, to this small buffer that he is a alert enough to register Kamui talking to some unknown before he steps into the room._

"_Who were you talking to, Kamui?" he enquires once the boy is settled at his side._

"_Kimoru Yuji."_

"_The author?"_

_Kamui replies to the positive and desperate to ask this other if he did, indeed, know Seishiro he enquires,_

"_Would you mind if I had a moment with him?"_

_He does not miss the momentary flash of disappointment in Kamui's eyes and then the boy is again on his feet._

"_I'll go and fetch him, shall I?"_

_There is a whispered conversation on the other side of the door and then a darkly clothed individual is stepping into the room._

_Though he has never met this man before there is something familiar about him and the odd aura that surrounds him._

"_Shirou-kun informed me that you wanted a moment."_

_He considers starting an empty conversation, yet something about the manner of this other tells him such a thing would be pointless. _

_Thus he pushes himself a little up in the bed and enquires,_

"_Do you know Sakurazuka Seishiro?"_

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T: Yep first cliff hanger of the fic…don't worry am on holiday next week so the update should be Wednesday at the latest!

I would have thought that Seiichiro is responsible for 'The Cage' reaching Subaru's hands…most likely he visited with a copy of the book and told Subaru something like "I thought you'd like the tone of the book" or something along those lines!

I liked the idea, in the film 'The butterfly affect', of the main character being able to see what his tiny change had done to the future and that this glimpse starts to degenerate his mind...thus I twiddled with the idea a bit and thus we reach this point.

My father (wound/injury expert as he is) assured me that as long as the haemorrhage is somewhere 'unimportant' on the brain a small one would not be considered overwhelmingly serious…most likely a doctor would be a little more worried than Subaru's is but I wanted my two Sumeragi's to meet and thus Sakurazuka Subaru had to be pretty quickly discharged from the hospital.

Kamui is responding to the fact that Yuji is actually Subaru, thus his rather swift acceptance of someone who is a complete stranger…don't worry 1999 Subaru will query this OOC next chapter!

I think that's it…as always don't be afraid to ask if you're not sure as questions help me sew up plot holes as best I can! R+R just because!


	6. Curiosity

6. Curiosity.

T: Not too much to say about the chapter up here will highlight flash points at the bottom of the fic! Again _italics _are the thought process of 1999 Subaru and everything like :this: is spoken by tree-san. I own nothing here apart from the increasingly ropy plot!

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He is surprised by the forward nature of the question and the change in the other that such a question denotes.

It is a change that holds a great deal of potential and, curious as to how far he can push he replies,

"I know a Sakurazuka Seishiro, yes."

He is graced with a flash of the mind of his other self, of the anger and the jealousy within his heart and then, again, he is seeing through his own eyes.

"If that was all…"

"No!" There is desperation in his eye now and Subaru halts, waiting patiently for the question that he knows is coming.

"Has Seishiro talked to you of someone…special…in his life?"

"He told me that he had loved someone long ago, but that that someone had turned away from him."

He is greeted with another flash of his other self's mind, of the painful ache in his heart as he hears those words and then the other enquires,

"Do you love him?"

He knows, instantly, that his answer to this question will effect the course of his destiny…knows that this is a key point in matters and yet he does not know what answer will bring him his desired result.

He decides, after a moment, to play the matter cautiously and to risk a choice only when he was clearer as to what his next step was to be.

Stepping forward he manages to voice the words,

"There is more to this than you know…" Before another pain flashes across his forehead and the world fades away.

…………………………………………………………………………………

_As the other steps towards him he is greeted with an odd double image of the man._

_The first of a relatively plain gentleman with eyes that, despite their commonness, seem somehow unique. The second is of a pale fade with eyes that are of the greatest of fascination to him._

_For the left is as his own eye colour, while the right is the beautiful hazel of Seishiro's remaining eye._

_To have such an eye…to look at himself and see always a little of Seishiro…he would give almost anything._

_He wishes to know why this other is masking such a gift…wishes to know how the other will reply to this question…_

_However the other manages only to inform him,_

"_There is more to this than you know…" Before he collapses._

_He presses the call button and an instant later the nurses are flocking about the other, their voices dipped into a murmured concern. _

_The other is taken, eventually, for testing and once the nurses have again vacated the room Kamui returns. _

"_Will Kimoru-san be alright?" He enquires, the concern in his voice enough that Subaru counters with an enquiry of,_

"_How long have you known him, Kamui?"_

"_We met only a little before I came to see you…"_

"_But?"_

"_But I feel as though I have known him for far longer."_

_He too had felt an instant connection to this stranger…to the power in the words of his novel and the power inherent within him…_

_Yet what that familiarity might be he could not say…nor could he completely understand what the other had meant by his oblique statement._

_After an hour of simple conversation with Kamui there is a knock on the door and then the doctor is crossing over the threshold,_

"_I have been informed that Kimoru-san was with you when he collapsed, Sumeragi-san."_

"_That is correct."_

"_Were you discussing anything stressful or arguing in any manner?"_

"_No."_

"_I see."_

"_He seemed a little ill when I met him in the hallway." Kamui remarked. _

_The doctor seemed to brighten a little at that and thanking the boy he turned to leave the room,_

"_Is Kimoru-san going to be alright?" Kamui enquired._

"_He is in a very serious condition and the next few hours are going to prove crucial."_

"_What is wrong with him?"_

"_He has suffered several small haemorrhages in his brain. Haemorrhages that are getting closer to the more important sections of his brain tissue, _

"_We have sedated him in order that his mind might be given the chance to heal itself…"_

"_But you are not hopeful?"_

"_As I have said the next few hours will be the hardest. After that things will either improve or dissolve even further."_

"_Might I see him?"_

"_He will not be able to respond to you."_

"_Perhaps not, but I shall feel happier for seeing him."_

"_If you will follow me then."_

_Kamui gains his feet and catching his hands into his own he informs him,_

"_I shall not be long, Subaru." Before he follows on the doctors heals._

_Now that he is, at last, alone, Subaru can contemplate the oddity of Kamui's attachment to the author and of his final words before he had collapsed. _

'_There is more to this than meets the eye…'_

_It was clear to him now that this was indeed the case; that something was occurring in his life that was not connected either to the spiritual realm or to the 'End Of the World' and yet as to what this oddity was…as to who Kimoru Yuji was…he was ignorant still._

………………………………………………………………………………..

He could hear Kamui's voice as a distant thing in the darkness and though he could register the concern in the boy's voice he could not separate the individual words.

This he comprehends quickly is because he is being drugged and yet why he is under such sedation is a thing that takes a moment more for him to understand.

Clearly his condition had grown serious enough that they felt sedation was the only solution and yet if he remained trapped in this place then the tragedy upon the would still come to pass…indeed due, in part, to his 'interference' it would become all the more painful.

For in this timeline his other self would be even less certain of Seishiro's confession…would hear those final words and believe them as the final part of the terrible game that had been played always between them.

A belief that would drive him first into despair and then, upon receiving the 'gift' of Seishiro's eye, further into madness.

He needed to undo the harm he had caused…need to assure that Seishiro did not perish and yet how?

:Let me aid you: The voice of the tree is stronger than Kamui's voice and yet even it has been faded by the strength of the sedative.

'How?' The enquiry more for a confirmation of his suspicions than for curiosities sake.

:Use my power to rejuvenate the damage to your mind, for once you have recovered there will be no need to keep you sedated.:

'Yet would not such a thing risk exposing me to Seishiro?'

:Perhaps and yet you thought to do such a thing anyway, did you not:

He knows the tree is perfectly correct in that supposition and, aware that he has little other choice, he lets go his hold upon the sakura's power.

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T Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuun! Things get more and more complex don't they?

Only one niggle here as far as I'm concerned and that's the doctors decision to sedate Yuji…I have a feeling this isn't really the procedure for any sort of brain haemorrhaging but it's how my doctors dealing with things…this because he's not really sure why these things are happing to Yuji and because I needed a way to get myself, temporarily, out of the hole I created when I made him sick! Next chapter Sunday at the latest until then R+R!


	7. Truths

7. Truths.

T: Beware the cliff hanger in this chapter; it's a particularly frustrating one! Little else to say about this chapter here so will inform you that the warnings remain the same, _italics_ have the same meaning and its still not mine!

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The doctor is the first thing he sees as he stirs from his 'sleep', the expression on the older man's face telling of how serious he had believed Subaru's condition to be and how 'miraculous' his recovery had been.

"How long have I been out?" He enquires, the words slurred still for the effects of the drugs.

"A day, Kimoru-san."

"Did the haemorrhaging grow worse?"

"Yes."

"And now?"

"Looking at your scans, Kimoru-san, I can see no signs that there were ever any haemorrhages on your brain."

"How is that possible?"

"I believe it might simply have been an abnormality on the scans."

"Then what of the headaches and the fainting?"

"I can not say." He pauses a moment to read his chart and then he remarks, "I can not keep you here, Kimoru-san, however, I would ask that you return tomorrow for a check up."

He agrees despite his awareness that there shall be no hospital left by the afternoon and thanking the doctor for his hard work he pushes himself off of his bed.

He decides, once he is outside in the corridor, to finish what he had started and turns down towards his other self's hospital room.

He makes it but two feet when the gentle seductiveness of the 'Kamui's' voice enquires,

"Who are you then?"

Meeting the eyes of the boy he notes, swiftly, that he sees still the others true face, a fact that both pleases him and confuses him at the same time.

"Kimoru Yuji."

"Ah, the boy who has so confused the Wish of the Sakurazukamori." He feels the others eyes regarding him a moment beneath the lenses balanced on his nose and then he remarks,

"You should not be here…indeed you should not even exist."

"Yes still I am here and still I exist."

"Why, I wonder?"

"For the sake of a Wish."

The other starts laughing then, the sound of the thing sending a little shiver up his spine.

"I believe that is a very true statement." The other is at his side then, his fingers pulling hard at Subaru's hair, "You exist for a Wish that, like so many others, was to remain un-granted.

"Yet it seems that the other dealer of Wishes has become sentimental in her old age and thus you are here." The 'Kamui' releases his grip and smiling he enquires,

"Let us see which of the Sakurazukamori has the stronger wish, shall we?" Before he leaves his side at last.

The ground begins to tremble all of a minute later and he is caught into the press of people attempting to escape from the building before it collapsed.

The press of bodies pushes him as far as the hospitals entrance before a strong grip pulls him from the tide.

"This is an unexpected surprise, Yuji-kun." Seishiro does seem genuinely surprised, though whether this emotion is for his presence here, or for the change Seishiro will be able to feel in his aura, he can not, as yet, tell.

"Then you are here to rescue Sumeragi-san are you?"

A flair of raw power flickers a moment in the hazel of the other's eye and then he is smiling an all but predatory smile,

"So you have met Subaru-kun, have you?"

"Our paths have crossed, yes."

"Such envy, Yuji-kun, I could almost believe that you cared for me."

"You have lost your confidence, Sakurazuka-san."

"No, I have simply been allowed to see the matter with greater clarity."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I can feel the sakura upon you, Yuji-kun and that I comprehend, at last, why I was so drawn to you…why you, in turn, have been so cold."

Curious as to whether Seishiro has realised his true identity he enquires,

"Are you not curious as to how I have the Sakura's spell upon me?"

"No." He pulls him in for a kiss then, his lips and the strength within them a thing he has missed with an almost feverish intensity.

"I have decided that I have no want to comprehend you, Yuji-kun, nor your connection to the dark heart of me.

"I wish only to erase you from my mind and my heart…wish only to return to the world that I do comprehend and to he who owns my soul."

Though this statement is so unlike Seishiro…though the fragility contained within the words is unnerving…he is glad for what it means.

Glad that, for the moment, he has not twisted destiny completely from its course.

Brushing his fingers through Seishiro's hair he enquires,

"Is Sumeragi-san the one you told me of?"

"Yes."

"It did not completely occur as you said, did it?"

"No and yet such things no longer concern you."

Stepping free the other's grip he smiles an enigmatic smile and replies,

"Perhaps not." Before he allows an illusion to wrap about him.

……………………………………………………………………………

_He recalls the earthquake as a collection of fractured images…_

…_a cloud of dust drifting around him as the ceiling begins to crumble…_

…_a pair of strong arms wrapping about him…_

…_the blinding light of the afternoon sun distracting him a moment and then the deep violet of Kamui's eyes._

_The boy had insisted that he had not been the one to save him, something that he believed without doubt and yet…_

_If he had not been saved by Kamui then who was responsible?_

_There was a faint hope in his heart that he had been saved by Seishiro, and yet such a thing was all but foolish..._

_The Sakurazukamori considered him little more than dust, after all._

'He told me that he had loved someone long ago.' _Kimoru-san had seemed genuine as he had spoken those words and something in the bitterness with which he had uttered them had made it seem as though he believed their truth. _

_Yet had Seishiro been telling Kimoru-san the truth, or had he been playing some odd game with the other?_

_If it had been a game then what purpose had the words held? Had they been uttered in an attempt to coin favour from the author or, perhaps, to breed a familiarity between them?_

_Yet if it had been truth then what did it mean for his own future?_

_He had want to be important to Seishiro if even for a moment…had believed the only way for such a thing to be possible was to die in the others arms._

_Yet if there were another way…_

_If Seishiro had believed him important enough to save him…_

"_We need to talk." That is Kimoru-san's voice and pushing himself a little up in the bed he is greeted with the other's visage. _

"_How did you get in here?"_

"_I jumped." The other replied, a familiar smile falling onto his lips a moment later._

"_What did you mean by the words you said in the hospital?"_

"_Precisely what I said, Sumeragi-san." He steps further into the room then, his features falling into shadow as he crosses out of the moonlight. "However, I believe you have want for a more coherent explanation and I shall gladly give you one…"_

"_If?"_

"_There is no price for this information, Sumeragi-san. I ask only that you listen carefully to all that I have to say and that you interrupt only when you believe it of great importance."_

_He nods and the other comes, then, to sit on the end of the bed. _

"_I am as yourself, Sumeragi-san..."_

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T: He he…I warned you didn't I? This is actually one of my favourite chapters so far, hopefully it shows in the writing style! I can't actually think of any notes to put here so I'm just going to ask you to R+R. Next chapter up on Tuesday.


	8. Illusion

8. Illusion.

T: Have finally reached the end of this thing on paper and can now officially say 'two more chapters to go'. Also now that I know where this is going I'm upping the angst one more time just to be safe! Apart from that the warnings are the same and, yep you guessed it, I own nothing apart from the plot!

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Though he knew that he had to tell his other self something…knew that left to his own devises his other self would brood upon his words and twist them until they became as knives to wound him…

He was, however, still uncertain as to what to tell the other.

To be unaware of what was to come, to stand helpless as destiny played out…such a thing had been tragedy enough…

Yet to know such a thing was to occur, to stand upon the Rainbow Bridge and know of what his Wish was to turn into…

He believes that such knowledge held within it the potential to erode at the sanity of his other self.

Eventually he had come up with a solution and thus settled he had come into the shadow of the Clamp Campus.

Crossing the barrier about the school had proved easier than he believed it might, this, he supposed, because he was, at this time, still an ally to Kamui.

His other self is wrapped into the sheets of his bed, his skin pail and gaunt in the light of the moon.

Unlike the previous meeting he cannot feel the emotions of the other; something he assumes is due to the Tree's protective influence.

Once he is granted permission to weave his tale he comes to settle on the foot of the bed.

"I am as yourself, Sumeragi-san…" He pauses and shaking his head he remarks, "Or rather I understand what it is that you are feeling.

"You see I too loved one of the Sakurazukamori…I also held a Wish to die at the hands of the one I loved, a Wish that was turned so terribly against me…

"I met him when I was sixteen and he was so kind…so gentle…that I could not but fall for him.

"Eventually I found the courage to tell him of my heart and he accepted it without cruelty…told me that he felt as I…" He smiles and turning to again face his other self he continues with his tale. "One night I awoke to find him gone from my side and curious as to where he had gone I headed downstairs.

"The house was empty apart from myself and a little concerned now for his welfare I phoned the police.

"They told me that they could do nothing until he had been gone for at least twenty four hours and I resigned myself to a sleepless night by the phone.

"At two o'clock in the morning he came back home, his hands coated in blood and an empty smile upon his face…I was so relieved to see him that neither of those things registered, so relieved that I registered only that he was alive.

"Then his blood soaked fingers were sinking into my right eye and his smiling lips were telling me the truth of what eh was, were speaking to me of murder and betrayal as though they were but trifling amusements…

"I eventually came back to myself a week later, one eye blind and my mind filled with confusion as to why I lived still.

"I could not believe it was because he cared…could not believe he has hurt me even though he loved me. Eventually I came to the conclusion that he was toying with me and, for a little while, my heart hardened against him.

"A month after that I met him again and he was so different to how he had been that night, so much as the one I had loved, that my heart melted.

"He asked me why I believed he had saved me and I told him of the conclusion I had formed…

"I shall never forget the look in his eye as I told him how little I trusted him…will never forget how guilty he seemed for being the one to place such doubts in my mind…"

"What happened?" His other self enquires, the eager edge in his voice all the encouragement he needs.

"He kissed me softly on the lips and told me why he had done as he had…told me that the Sakurazukamori was succeeded always by they that they loved most…told me that he had pushed at me until he believed I hated him enough to kill him and then…"

A flash of Seishiro's dying smile appears, momentarily, in his mind and, a genuine depression taking him, he says,

"While talking to me he had placed a knife into my hands and once concluded his tale he walked onto the blade.

"As he lay dying in my arms he told me that he had loved me always…begged me to take his eye in order to remove the one physical scar he had given me.

"That request I granted without hesitation and in taking the eye I tool also my place as Sakurazukamori.

"I managed the role for a month and then my grief became too much…life became too much…"

"You killed yourself?" There is doubt in the other's voice and standing he calls a little of the trees power to him before replying,

"When a Sakurazukamori dies they pass into the Tree, the power of their soul fading as their successor grows.

"Yet I had no true successor and thus I endured…thus I was forced to remain aware of everything about me. Was forced to 'live' when all I wished was to fade completely from this world.

"In the end, though, that punishment has proved as a positive thing for it has allowed me to meet Seishiro and it has allowed me the chance to stop the tragedy happening again."

"You believe Seishiro loves me?"

"Do you believe otherwise?"

His other self considers the question a moment and then he replies,

"He has shown me no more or no less respect than one would show a cherished object…he has pushed at me with such strength…"

"All for you to hate him enough that you kill him."

"Yet even if I could have pushed him from my heart…even if I had grown to hate him…I could never kill him."

He is aware that he can continue to lie, that by spinning a convincing tale he can make his other self believe him without need to mention Hokuto's final spell and yet…

He wishes his other self to know this small truth, to know that his beloved sister had not died completely in vain.

"There is a spell upon both Seishiro and yourself, a spell cast using the last of your sister's strength."

His other self tenses and then he enquires,

"What was the purpose of this spell?"

"I believe she cast it in order to protect you and yet it may yet be used to cause you the greatest of harm."

"What is the spell?"

"Should Seishiro attempt to kill you in the same manner as he killed yourself the spell will cause his attack to lash back onto himself."

"Are you being truthful?"

"Of what use would it be for me to lie, Sumeragi-san?"

"I do not know and yet there is something of this story that seems…strange…to me."

"How so?"

"Why did you pursue Seishiro? How can a ghost write a novel and how are you able to interact with the world about you?"

"As I said previously I am not an ordinary spirit, for I am imbued still with a little of the sakura's magic, enough that I am able to 'interact' with the world about me as though I am living…

"Think of me as a highly complex illusion if it makes things easier." He graces his other self with a playful wink and then settling back onto the bed he says, "The novels are my own works, written while I was living still and given in trust to a companion of mine who has worked tirelessly to get them published for me.

"As to my pursuit of Seishiro…you will have to forgive me for that, Sumeragi-san, but I was curious as to what he was like.

"The man I loved was his grandfather, you see and I had an idle thought that perhaps I might find a little of my love within Seishiro."

"Did you?"

"He looks a little as his grandfather and his eyes are the same colour…" He brushes his fingers momentarily across his right eye and then smiling a small, empty smile, he remarks, "He is not, however, the same internally. For his grandfather was an intensely passionate man who willingly gave the heart of him over in the briefest of instants.

"Seishiro, however, seems much calmer and I believe his heart is a thing bestowed only after the greatest of thought."

"Do you care for him?"

"No and I would be foolish to do as such. For only you shall ever own his heart, Sumeragi-san."

His other self smiles, ever so slightly and his eyes drifting to his hands he remarks,

"I wish I could be as certain as you, Kimoru-san."

"Then ask, Sumeragi-san."

"Why would he answer me truthfully?"

"Perhaps if you simply enquired he would not and yet if you challenged him…if you told him all of what I have said and then told him of your own wish…

"Perhaps then you might hear the answer you so desire."

His other self looks still uncertain and yet, the faint smile present still on his lips he says,

"Thank you for giving me hope, Kimoru-san."

"I have no need for your thanks, Sumeragi-san. I wish only to avert a repeat of my own tragedy."

He gains his feet then and bowing once he heads out into the night, his heart hopeful that, this time at least, the tragedy on the Rainbow Bridge might be averted.

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T: Nothing to rant about as far as I'm aware so I'll just ask you to R+R. Next chapter Sunday at the latest (Am back to work I fear!)


	9. Words

9. Words. 

T: The next chapter is the last and thus there is another CLIFFHANGER warning on this chapter. Other warnings remain the same and the _italic_ usage returns this chapter so be on the look out! I own the plot and that is it I fear!

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He knows that today will prove as an end of his ministrations…either because Seishiro would survive or because the bridge would fall still.

He knows that no matter the outcome of the day he will have to, at last, pay his dept to Yuuko…knows that, should the outcome prove disastrous, there will be no chance to try again.

He also, finally, has an idea of what he shall be using to pay his dept and, should his theory prove correct, he is not upset at the price of this Wish.

He has come to the Rainbow Bridge to observe events and, so as to avoid the temptation to interfere; he has settled himself onto the top of one of the bridge's supportive arches.

His other self is stood already upon the bridge, his fingers wrapped about a cigarette and his face turned to regard the open expanse of Tokyo bay.

Seishiro appears as if from nowhere and desperate not to miss out on proceedings Subaru breaths the tension from his body and forces away the protective influence of the sakura.

After a moment the 'memories' begin to swamp his mind and closing his eyes he allows that world to become, for the moment, his own.

_There is blood thick on Seishiro's fingers and, despite himself, he enquires,_

"_You just killed someone…killed them right here, didn't you?"_

_The wind kicks up the fabric of his coat, the hard sound of the resistance between air and cloth filling the silence a moment and then Seishiro responds,_

"_I am the Sakurazukamori, after all."_

_He registers almost immediately that the other has not truly answered his question…that Seishiro has, in fact, allowed him to draw his own conclusion._

_Shaking his head he enquires,_

"_Is that an admission, Seishiro-san or a denial?"_

_Seishiro does not reply, nor does he show any clear sign of being disconcerted by the enquiry. Feeling oddly sedate Subaru takes a step towards the other, his hands open so as to show the other that he is unarmed, then he informs Seishiro,_

"_Kimoru-san came to see me yesterday."_

_Seishiro seems still unaffected by this line of conversation and yet, when he enquires, "Has he told you everything, then?" there is the faintest hint of discomfort in his voice. _

_Upon receiving a positive reply Seishiro takes another drag from the stolen cigarette, dashes it to the floor and, while grinding the thing with the heal of his shoe, he enquires,_

"_What do you Wish for, Subaru?"_

"_Curious to see how the toy's mechanism works, Seishiro-san?"_

"_In understanding the purpose of an object we understand its true beauty."_

_The wind shifts and the faint creaking of the bridge as it catches into the air current is as a momentary distraction for the both of them._

_He wishes to simply ask Seishiro about his feelings…wishes to risk himself a little and yet…_

_No matter Kimoru-san's assurances he can not find the courage that such a risk requires…can not again expose his heart to the despair of rejection. _

"_Have you come here to defend the Kekkai or no?" Seishiro enquires, his finger reaching to pull free a single ofuda. _

_His want to fight, for the moment, faded, Subaru shakes his head and replies, _

"_I came to fulfil my Wish."_

"_I was told by the Kamui of the Dragons of Earth that your Wish was not what I believed it to be, yet why would you be here other than to kill me, Subaru-kun?"_

_Pulling at the binding upon his eye he leases the thing into the air and then looks to Seishiro before replying,_

"_To die."_

"_Why would you Wish for such a thing, Subaru-kun?"_

"_Because I believed that it was the only way I could be of significance to you…believed that it would be enough for me to spend my final moments in your arms."_

_There is a lazy smile present now on Seishiro's lips and though he has seen this smile before…though there is a chance still that this is a game…he can not help but feel that this is, somehow, different._

"_What of now, Subaru-kun?"_

"_Now…" He can feel his fragile confidence failing him, can feel his self loathing taking control and bighting back the desire to backtrack he continues with, "Now I have been told an interesting thing and I desire the chance to learn if it is truth or no before I die."_

"_Then ask."_

"_Is it true that the Sakurazukamori are succeeded by the one they love…that because you love me you had little choice but to hurt me in order that I would hate you?"_

"_If such a thing was true, Subaru-kun, then why would I wish to kill you?"_

"_Your 'want' to kill me is nothing other than a ruse created to reinforce my 'hatred' or you also…"_

_He steps forward again and Seishiro is now so close that he can feel the other's warmth and smell his rich, intoxicating, scent._

_Lifting his fingers he first removes Seishiro's sunglasses and, that final barrier disposed of, he places the palm of his left hand flat against the other's chest,_

"_Also you were entertaining the idea of using Hokuto's spell were you not?"_

_He feels the minute increase of Seishiro's heartbeat and thus he is not, this time, fooled by the mask of calm that coats the others words as he replies,_

"_How did you learn of that spell?"_

"_Does it matter, Seishiro? Is not the real issue why you believed such a spell would solve anything…?" _

_The other shifts a little at that, one hand moving to cover that on his chest and the other tangling into Subaru's hair._

"_I killed Hokuto, Subaru-kun and countless others like her…I have participated in heartless activities and I have hurt you beyond belief. _

"_Why would you wish anything other than to kill me? That was what I had believed and yet I knew that you were a kind boy…knew that even if you were pushed you might not be able to hurt me and so I held to the secret of the spell in the thought that I could use it should you hesitate when the time came."_

"_Is that the truth, Seishiro, or is it simply another illusion? Might you have used my hate as an excuse to…?"_

"_I wish only for you to be mine always, Subaru-kun, for you to think of myself alone and for the only mars upon your skin to have come by my hand."_

_It is not, precisely, the confession he had yearned to hear and yet he knows that it is close…knows that by admitting this dark obsession Seishiro had exposed himself. _

_Felling a slight increase in confidence Subaru tilts himself a little towards the other and informs him,_

"_You have such a thing already." Before Seishiro takes him up on his initiative and closes the gap between them._

_Kimoru-san had inferred that Seishiro had a passionate edge to his personality and Subaru had disregarded this belief as nothing more than absent fancy…yet caught now into the fevered warmth of the other's lips he realises that the author had been speaking the truth…_

_Realised that there was a side to Seishiro that he had never seen…a portion of the other that was meant for him alone. _

_The raw intensity of this hidden Seishiro frightens him a little and yet it excites him also; for there is nothing here if the heartless Sakurazuka or the fatherly vet, no, this passion belongs to but one persona…_

"_Would you play now at being my lover, Seishiro?" He enquires once the others lips leave him at last._

"_Do you not desire such a thing?"_

"_Not if there is no heart to it, no."_

"_Then I fear I must disappoint you, Subaru-kun, for no matter what you believe I still care for you only as much as one would care for a glass."_

_He almost allows himself to believe those words…almost allows himself to be swept back into Seishiro's cunning illusion, and then something sparks suddenly in his mind._

"_If that were true then why would it matter to you if I thought of another? Why would you care enough about my 'hate' of you to allow me to kill you and why did you not find another way to destroy me?_

"_Seishiro, no matter what you believe I do not hate you and no matter what you would have me believe I do not think you hate me."_

_Seishiro brushes his fingers across the lid of his blind eye and, his smile deepening, he replies,_

"_No, I do not hate you, Subaru-kun and yet, in the end, my feelings do not matter._

"_For as long as I am Sakurazukamori you are forced to hate me and when that title passes on…" He pauses a moment, most likely to seriously consider his words and then he says, "I believe you might come to hate me then, also, for I have chosen you as my successor…chosen, selfishly, to turn you against everything you hold dear in order that you might exist only for my memory."_

"_Seishiro, I do not care about what you are or how you use your magic, no do I care that destiny seems to have set us apart…_

"_I love you, after all."_

_It has been nine years since he had first wished to voice those words and though Seishiro has changed…though he, in turn, has changed…he feels again all of sixteen. _

_Seishiro pulls him close to him and the beating of his heart in Subaru's ear is as the oddest of comforts to him._

_Then the other is pressing his lips to his ear and he hears a whispered, "I love you also," before the heat of the other is gone from his side. _

He is little surprised when Seishiro settles next to him, he is, however, taken off guard when the other enquires,

"Why are you doing this, Subaru-kun?"

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T: Yep Sei-chan has finally twigged! What will this mean for the future? What is Subaru's payment? Only the final chapter has the answers! I may post the last one Monday…it depends on whether I get all my coursework done or no! R+R


	10. Payment

10. Payment.

T: It's the final chapter and so the first order of business is to thank all my lovely reviews for keeping me going and to all those who have read this thing for giving me a go! Next I have to warn that the ANGST remains high for this chapter and that _italics _are still being used in the same way! I own nothing here apart from the rather ropey plot!

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"Why are you doing this, Subaru-kun?"

He regards the other a moment and then, pushing away the illusionary appearance that the sakura had given him, he enquires,

"How long have you known?"

"I knew the instant that your other self told me that he knew of Hokuto's spell and yet I had begun to suspect something of the sort after I saw you at Shinjuku hospital."

Subaru lights a cigarette and after taking a drag he offers the item to Seishiro. The Sakurazukamori accepts graciously and Subaru waits until the other seems less on edge before replying,

"I wished for the events upon this bridge to move in a different manner to their original course."

"Was the outcome not to your liking?"

"No."

After a moment of silence Seishiro steps, cautiously, into his field of vision and, bending down, he presses a hand to Subaru's right eye.

"The day that the Kamui of the Dragons of Earth took your eye I entertained the idea of letting you have my own to replace it. That way not only would the Kamui's taint be removed from your face, but you would also have a constant reminder of me there always before you."

"You truly are selfish, aren't you, Seishiro-san?"

Seishiro leases his grip on his eye and stepping back to Subaru's side he enquires,

"Have you succeeded?"

"You are living still, are you not?"

"What shall you do now?"

"Why should it matter to you, Seishiro?"

The other does not answer this but instead he gestures down towards the road and enquires,

"Did you see the events of this day with your eyes or your mind?"

"My mind."

"Then for the moment, at least, my destiny remains as it was."

He turns his head a little and Seishiro graces him with a warm, accommodating smile, before informing him,

"For the moment this form of yourself exists still in the future, thus are you able to see images from your 'past' in your mind."

He little likes how much sense this logic makes, for it means that Seishiro was to die still…or at least that he is to become Sakurazukamori.

"Perhaps, in the future, we shall find another way for the legacy of the sakura to pass onward."

"Even if that were the case then how do you explain your right eye?"

For the first since the 'gift' of the eye had been bestowed to him Subaru despises its presence in his face and he entertains, momentarily, the thought of gouging it free his skin.

Seishiro places a kiss to his forehead and informs him, "I enjoyed seeing the fruits of my labour, Subaru-kun," Before he is gone from his side.

He remains perched on top the bridge but a few moments more to contemplate the others words and then he too jumps off into the horizon.

…………………………………………………………………………………..

Yuuko is sat at the entrance to her shop when he arrives, a pipe clenched between her teeth and her thin form wrapped into a plain, black, kimono.

"Is this the price I must pay, Yuuko-san? Or is his fate so strong that it can not be altered?"

"All living things die, Subaru-kun, this is a thing that not even I can change." She takes a drag from her pipe and then she informs him, "Part of the price that you must pay for your Wish is, indeed, to know that he shall one day fall by your hand."

"Then of what use was my Wish?"

"You have stopped the tragedy upon the bridge from occurring and in doing as such you have subtly changed destiny's course.

"For you will no longer turn against the seals and thus Kamui will come to you of his suspicion of Hinoto.

"Thus will the duel aspect of her nature be discovered before it becomes too late and thus will many of the tragedies that were caused by this duality be averted." Again she pauses to inhale a little of the pipes smoke and then, an odd smile on her lips, she remarks, "Such things hold little significance to you, however and I would tell you of that which you have want to hear if only your naivety in that regard was not another part of your payment."

It is enough for him to know that he has made some difference to Seishiro's fate, that though the other will fall still by his hand, such a thing may not be as much a tragedy as it had been in his reality.

"What of the final piece of payment?"

Yuuko seems a little off put by the blunt manner of the request and it takes her a few minuets to reply,

"I believe that you know already."

Pressing a hand to his head he says,

"The sakura has been protecting me from the ravages of time and by pushing away its hold upon me I have caused the degeneration to begin again in my mind.

"Soon enough the effects of this degeneration will become enough that I shall again be restricted to a hospital bed, then it shall be but a short time until I die and in doing as such, pay the last of my dept."

"I can take the pain away from you; Subaru-kun…can make it as swift as possible."

"I have no means left to pay for such a favour, Yuuko-san and even if I did I would not take you up on the offer."

She is more than aware that he is refusing this aid for the sake of a vain hope and the pain she feels for this knowledge is clear in her eyes.

She can not, however, warn him that his actions are foolish, for he has nothing with which to pay for the advice and she can no longer give such things for free.

He thanks her for allowing him the opportunity to realise his hidden wish and then he leaves her to her thoughts.

…………………………………………………………………………………..

He eventually comes to the sakura and settling himself into one of the higher branches he allows his body to relax…allows the reality of his other self to take him over…

_Kamui is bent over what appears to be a text book when he finds him and he thinks to allow the boy his privacy when the other enquires,_

"_What can I do for you, Subaru?"_

"_I wanted a moment to talk to you, but you are busy…"_

"_Stay, please, I am not getting all that far with this anyway." He remarks as he gestures, wildly, towards the textbook._

"_I wish to stop fighting."_

"_Why?"_

"_Yesterday I went to the Kekkai on the Rainbow_ _Bridge_…_Seishiro-san was there..."_

"_What happened? Did he hurt you, Subaru?"_

"_No…we did not fight."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because someone told me a story that made me think a little clearer about my situation with Seishiro-san. They also told me something that made Seishiro-san think a little also."_

"_Has something positive come of this, Subaru?"_

"_He told me that he loved me, Kamui and I do not think that he was lying."_

"_I see." The boy turns to face him at last, his eyes lingering a great while on Subaru's face before he says, "If you feel that you can no longer fight then I understand, Subaru and yet I would ask, selfishly, that you stayed here with us."_

"_There is no where else I would care to be, Kamui and thank you for understanding."_

He smiles a little for the connotations of this new 'memory' and though he can already feel the pain encroaching into his head he does not regret this decision.

For this way, at least, he might be allowed the smallest of glimpses into destinies new course…

Might be given a little hope for the future of his other self and the one he loved.

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T: Yep that's it…no, I'm not going to tell you how things pan out between our two favourite Onmyoji…yes this is because I don't really know! Nothing else to say about this, hopefully most of the loose ends have been tied up! R+R this is your last chance after all!


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